Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #18 — A Love in Action

Picture: Counsel #18 — A Love in Action CR 281.1

Perhaps the best part of your day isn’t receiving flowers or monetary gifts, but someone noticing how tired you are and saying, “Sit down. I’ve got this.” Making sacrificial efforts and doing consistent thoughtful deeds — acts of service — may be exactly what makes you feel loved most, not receiving gifts.^[298] CR 281.2

In marriage, real love shows up in everyday moments that aren’t promoted publicly for the world to see on social media. Small acts of selflessness like taking your spouse’s car to get cleaned without them asking, or taking the kids out to the park because you know your significant other had a draining week at work and could use a nap, these are the things that truly matter. It’s about seeing beneath the “I’m fine” and catering to them anyway. However, issues will arise when only one partner makes these efforts, as God intended for marriage to be a mutual give and take. If you wonder how to best cater to your spouse, pay close attention to their triggers and ask yourself, “What can I do to make them feel better today?” Doing the things that are important to your partner shows them how much you love and value them. CR 281.3

“A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” Proverbs 11:25 NIV CR 281.4

“Love, courtesy, self-sacrifice—these are never lost.” Ellen White in The Retirement Years , p. 153 CR 281.5

Reflect: What are the ways your spouse loves you best? CR 281.6