Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #17 — Conflict Resolution

Picture: Counsel #17 — Conflict Resolution CR 251.1

Every couple faces conflict. The issue isn’t if you’ll disagree - it’s how you handle it. Do you pause, listen, and seek understanding? Or do you avoid talking, yell, or walk away? Many relationships fall apart not because of the problems themselves but because both parties don’t know how to work through problems with patience, humility, and grace. CR 251.2

When conflict resolution isn’t learned early on, frustration turns into resentment, and resentment leads to emotional separation. Despite what many people think, normal conflict is not a threat to your marriage. It’s an opportunity to grow and to learn how to express yourself using “I” statements, while actively listening without interrupting. Most importantly, it allows you to invite God into the process. Prayer can soften the heart in ways that words cannot. Seeking God when conflict arises allows the Holy Spirit to convict you, causing you to see your wrongs more clearly, which increases the chances of you offering a sincere apology. If your marriage is currently on life support, Christian counselors, mentors, and pastors can equip you with healthy tools to rebuild what’s on the brink of being lost.^[266] CR 251.3

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Romans 12:18 NIV CR 251.4

“I can see my Redeemer, in whom I have fresh encouragement to trust as a never-failing Source of strength.” Ellen White in In Heavenly Places, p. 117 CR 251.5

Reflect: How do you approach conflict in your marriage? CR 251.6