Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #16 — Love Prioritized

Picture: Counsel #16 — Love Prioritized CR 250.1

It’s easy to let the most pressing needs in life steal your attention. The kids need help with homework, or work deadlines are pressing. Maybe your extended family keeps asking you to come down for the holidays, despite being a 10-hour plane ride away. Slowly, without even noticing, your spouse drifts from being your priority to being an afterthought. CR 250.2

When these things happen, many couples say, “We’ll reconnect once things calm down,” but life never slows on its own. One thing will lead to another, years will pass, the kids will leave home, and both people will soon feel like strangers in the marriage. This is one reason many “empty-nest” marriages struggle - emotional distance grows quietly over time. In a Christian marriage, God’s design places your spouse second only to Him. That means protecting emotional energy, time, and affection for one another even in busy seasons. It doesn’t require grand gestures — just intentionality and consistency.^[265] CR 250.3

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8 NIV CR 250.4

“If the husband and wife would only continue to cultivate these attentions which nourish love, they would be happy in each other’s society and would have a sanctifying influence upon their families.” Ellen White in Our Father Cares, p. 181 CR 250.5

Reflect: How can you prioritize your spouse daily, in addition to dealing with your daily responsibilities? CR 250.6