Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #18 — Silent Sufferer

Picture: Counsel #18 — Silent Sufferer CR 252.1

Addiction is not just a personal issue; it’s a relational crisis! Whether it’s alcohol, pornography, gambling, drug use, or even any non-chemical/behavioral addiction, left untreated, it will eventually lead to broken trust, intimacy issues, communication breakdown, and spiritual misalignment in a marriage.^[267] CR 252.2

People suffering with an addiction often do so in silence, as they’re too ashamed to admit it. The enemy lies, saying you can manage your addiction privately. But sin thrives in secrecy, and unchecked addiction creates patterns of deception, avoidance, and isolation. If you’re struggling, find a support group of people with similar battles. Admit your struggle to your spouse, and if they are loving and supportive, ask if they’ll help hold you accountable. Most importantly, ask God for His grace to overcome. He wants to give it to you, but transformation can only begin with confession and genuine repentance. Scripture tells us that nothing has overtaken us that isn’t common to others, and that God is faithful to provide a way out. CR 252.3

If you suspect your spouse is struggling with addiction, set loving but firm boundaries. Support them and pray for them, but don’t enable destructive behavior. Healing takes time, but it also takes courage, honesty, and a willingness to surrender the addiction to God daily, sometimes moment by moment. CR 252.4

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36 NIV CR 252.5

“Satan is determined to have the human race as his subjects…” Ellen White in Temperance, p. 274 CR 252.6

Reflect: Is there any area of your life you’re struggling with in secret? Are you ready to face it? CR 252.7