Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #12 — Biblical Submission

Picture: Counsel #12 — Biblical Submission CR 246.1

The concept of biblical “submission” in marriage is often misunderstood. Submission is not about inferiority, control, or blind obedience, but a Christ-like attitude of mutual respect, love, and service within the marital covenant. CR 246.2

The submission asked of wives is linked to the husband’s call to love his wife as Christ loved the church. This love is sacrificial and nurturing, implying a servant-oriented leadership that prioritizes the wife’s well-being. When a husband embodies this Christ-like love, a Christian wife’s submission becomes a natural response rooted in trust and security. This biblical submission is not about suppressing a wife’s individuality or voice. Instead, it is a harmonious partnership where each spouse contributes unique strengths for the good of the family and God’s glory. Decisions are made through prayer, communication, and a shared desire to honor God’s will. The wife supports her husband’s godly leadership while maintaining her dignity and equal standing before God.^[261] CR 246.3

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Ephesians 5:21 NIV CR 246.4

“God has ordained that there should be perfect love and harmony between those who enter into the marriage relation.” Ellen White in The Adventist Home, p. 103 CR 246.5

Reflect: Is mutual submission practiced in your marriage, or is it more of a struggle for domination and control? CR 246.6