Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #16 — Faults Acknowledged

Picture: Counsel #16 — Faults Acknowledged CR 163.1

Have you ever tried to tell someone how their actions hurt you, only to be met with defensiveness, silence, or a sarcastic comment that made you regret even speaking up? It’s one of the loneliest feelings in a relationship - wanting honesty and connection but hitting a wall of pride instead.^[170] CR 163.2

Don’t get me wrong. Your true love won’t be perfect, but they will be willing to grow if they’re a godly partner. When you bring up something they did that offended you, they’ll be able to say things like, “That’s something I need to work on,” without making you feel guilty. This is the kind of humility that creates emotional safety, and it shows they care more about the relationship than about always being right. This doesn’t mean they won’t struggle or stumble from time to time, but the majority outcomes of disagreements should result in them being emotionally mature enough to own their mistakes. A healthy relationship is built on two people who can be honest with themselves and each other, and who welcome growth instead of running from it. God doesn’t want you to settle for someone who guards their pride more than your peace. CR 163.3

“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.” Proverbs 12:1 NIV CR 163.4

“God holds every one of us to an individual accountability…” Ellen White in Christian Service , p. 86 CR 163.5

Reflect: How does your partner respond to gentle, constructive criticism or feedback? CR 163.6