Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #15 — Healed

Picture: Counsel #15 — Healed CR 162.1

We all carry stories from our past - some beautiful, and some very painful. Although pain is inevitable, the key is finding a partner who has taken the time to learn from past mistakes, so their wounds won’t be carried into your relationship. (Being that partner is equally important!)^[169] CR 162.2

Dating someone who hasn’t done the spiritual work to heal from a broken heart will add a considerable amount of stress to your life, as they may unknowingly make you pay for someone else’s mistakes. Healing doesn’t mean they’re perfect or will come into the relationship with a clean slate, but it does mean that they’ve already faced their pain with honesty and invited God into those broken places. Someone who’s truly moved on from a past hurt will have forgiven where needed, taken responsibility for their own toxic patterns, and grown because of it. It’s always important not to rush to fix someone who hasn’t asked for healing. You weren’t created to be on a constant rescue mission and only God can change and heal the brokenhearted. All you can do is wait for the kind of love that walks in emotional wholeness and loves you with a heart that’s not still holding onto the past. CR 162.3

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalms 147:3 NIV CR 162.4

“When the Spirit of God takes possession of the heart, it transforms the life.” Ellen White in Maranatha, p. 70 CR 162.5

Reflect: Are you someone who tries to “fix” or “rescue” others? CR 162.6