The Ministry of Health and Healing

Chapter 33—Home Influences

Home should be to children the most attractive place in the world, and the mother’s presence should be its greatest attraction. Children have sensitive, loving natures. They are easily pleased and easily made unhappy. By gentle discipline, in loving words and acts, mothers may bind their children to their hearts. MHH 219.1

Young children love companionship and can seldom enjoy themselves alone. They yearn for sympathy and tenderness. They think that whatever they enjoy will please mother also, and it is natural for them to go to her with their little joys and sorrows. The mother should not wound their sensitive hearts by treating with indifference matters that, though trifling to her, are of great importance to them. Her sympathy and approval are precious. An approving glance, a word of encouragement or commendation will be like sunshine in their hearts, often making their whole day happy. MHH 219.2

Instead of sending her children from her, that she may not be annoyed by their noise or troubled by their little wants, let the mother plan amusement or light work to employ the active hands and minds. MHH 219.3

By entering into their feelings and directing their amusements and employments, the mother will gain the confidence of her children. This will enable her more effectually to correct wrong habits or check the manifestations of selfishness or passion. A word of caution or reproof spoken at the right time will be of great value. By patient, watchful love, she can turn the minds of the children in the right direction, cultivating in them beautiful and attractive traits of character. MHH 219.4

Mothers should guard against training their children to be dependent and self-absorbed. Never lead them to think that they are the center and that everything must revolve around them. Some parents give much time and attention to amusing their children, but children should be trained to amuse themselves, to exercise their own ingenuity and skill. Thus they will learn to be content with very simple pleasures. They should be taught to bear bravely their disappointments and trials. Instead of calling attention to every trifling pain or hurt, divert their minds; teach them to pass lightly over little annoyances or discomforts. Study to suggest ways by which the children may learn to be thoughtful of others. MHH 219.5

But do not neglect the children. Burdened with many cares, mothers sometimes feel that they cannot take time patiently to instruct their little ones and give them love and sympathy. They should remember that if the children do not find in their parents and in their home that which will satisfy their need for sympathy and companionship, they will look to other sources, where both mind and character may be endangered. MHH 220.1

For lack of time and thought, many a mother refuses her children some innocent pleasure, while her busy fingers and weary eyes are diligently engaged in work designed only for adornment, something that likely will serve only to encourage vanity and extravagance in their young hearts. As the children approach manhood and womanhood, these lessons bear fruit in pride and moral worthlessness. The mother grieves over her children’s faults but does not realize that the harvest she is reaping is from seed that she herself planted. MHH 220.2

Some mothers are not uniform in the treatment of their children. At times they indulge them to their injury; at other times they refuse some innocent gratification that would make the childish heart very happy. In this they do not imitate Christ. He loved the children. He comprehended their feelings and sympathized with them in their pleasures and their trials. MHH 220.3