Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #11 — Warning Signs Ahead

Picture: Counsel #11 — Warning Signs Ahead CR 109.1

Red flags in a romantic relationship are crucial indicators that something is misaligned with God’s ideal for love in your life. These signs often include behaviors like narcissism, excessive anger, addiction to pornography, alcohol or drug use, all qualities that don’t reflect the fruits of the spirit. CR 109.2

God calls us to relationships grounded in love, patience, and self-control,⁴ and red flags will always indicate areas where these qualities are absent. For example, a partner who refuses to apologize, take accountability, or always prioritizes their needs no matter what are sure signs that a relationship with them will not be healthy. Additionally, someone who yells threats and profanity during disagreements shows a lack of self-control, which can eventually lead to domestic abuse or worse. Recognizing red flags is essential for protecting yourself and seeking a relationship that honors God. As Christians, praying for wisdom and guidance from God regarding dating is the only way to ensure you’re entering a relationship where Christ-like love, respect, and accountability will thrive.⁵ CR 109.3

“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13:6, 7 NIV CR 109.4

“He has given them, in His Word, the light of truth; He has sent them warning, counsel, and admonition; but few will obey His voice.” Ellen White in To Be Like Jesus , p. 197 CR 109.5

Reflect: Are there any red flags in your relationship or potential relationship? Take them seriously. CR 109.6