Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #26 — Freed Feelings

Picture: Counsel #26 — Freed Feelings CR 289.1

Have you ever felt like you needed more reassurance, more time, or more connection than your partner, but felt guilty for asking? In healthy give and take, you’re allowed to be honest about what you need without fear of judgment or rejection. In other words, you shouldn’t be ashamed to feel your feelings and open up your heart to your spouse. CR 289.2

In today’s modern society, every person brings a different emotional rhythm into a relationship. One partner might need more words of affirmation, while the other feels grounded by shared silence, and that’s not a problem! It’s part of learning how to love each other fully, flaws and all. What matters most in a marriage is having the freedom to express your needs openly and respectfully with your partner. Sometimes give and take won’t feel perfectly even - balance doesn’t always mean 50/50 effort as much as it means both people feeling seen, heard, and supported. If one person is more emotionally expressive and the other more closed-off, it’s not about changing those qualities in each other, but about working together to meet in the middle, one step at a time.^[306] CR 289.3

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:2 NIV CR 289.4

“Strict honesty must be cultivated.” Ellen White in Our High Calling, p. 226 CR 289.5

Reflect: Do you feel safe sharing your needs and feelings with your spouse? CR 289.6