Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #24 — Inevitable Mistakes

Picture: Counsel #24 — Inevitable Mistakes CR 287.1

In any relationship, mistakes are expected. At times, your spouse may forget something important, or you’ll say the wrong thing. There will be moments of miscommunication or frustration — these things are unavoidable. It’s not about whether someone will mess up, but how each person responds when it happens. CR 287.2

Unhealthy dynamics expect perfection. In these kinds of relationships, there’s no room for grace, and at least one partner is usually always on edge, doing everything they can to avoid judgment or criticism. Real love, the kind modeled by Christ, leaves space for growth and doesn’t weaponize past failures or hold mistakes over the other person’s head. Just as Christ extends grace to us, both participants in a marriage, through faith, should offer grace to one another, especially when all chances of resolution seem to be lost. This kind of mutual forgiveness strengthens trust and deepens connection between partners — a dynamic that represents Christ in every way, shape, and form.^[304] CR 287.3

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8 NIV CR 287.4

“Do you make mistakes? Do not let this discourage you. The Lord may permit you to make small mistakes in order to save you from making larger mistakes.” Ellen White in Welfare Minist ry, p. 152 CR 287.5

Reflect: Are you showing the same grace you hope to receive? CR 287.6