Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #22 — Power of Speech

Picture: Counsel #22 — Power of Speech CR 256.1

There’s a certain kind of silence that settles into a marriage after too many careless words have been said. It happens slowly - a sarcastic remark here, an eye-roll there, or constant correction that drowns out reassurance. Over time, these harsh words will begin to echo louder than the love that once felt secure. CR 256.2

Every relationship weathers missteps, but when the pattern becomes criticism over encouragement, the heart of the relationship will begin to wear thin. A spouse who never feels truly seen, heard, or uplifted may begin to retreat emotionally, and this kind of emotional distance is much harder to measure or even repair once done. Constant jabs, belittlement, or making jokes about your spouse that further demean them isn’t the way of the Lord, as God calls us to something different - to speak life.^[273] The tongue has the power of life and death, so which route will you choose? Will you uplift your spouse by speaking words of life, or serve as an echo to the devil’s lies? Only you can choose.^[274] CR 256.3

“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21 NIV CR 256.4

“The tongue is a little member, but the words it frames have great power.” Ellen White in In Heavenly Places , p. 174 CR 256.5

Reflect: Do you spend more time pointing out flaws in your spouse, or uplifting them? CR 256.6