Manuscript Releases, vol. 20 [Nos. 1420-1500]


MR No. 1435—Unwise Remarriage Would Destroy Children's Respect

(Written to Mrs. M. C. B., February 24, 1910, from Sanitarium, California.)

I have just received a letter from Charles B, a student in the school at Lodi, California, pleading with me to inquire of the Lord concerning his mother, who, he says, is thinking of marrying a young man many years younger than herself. 20MR 59.1

I am surprised to hear that a mother forty-six years of age will imperil her happiness, her welfare, and her influence by marrying a young man of twenty. This is a strange matter and reveals a lack of sound judgment. The Lord would have this sister consider carefully the sure result of such a course of action. In this matter our sister must be under a strange influence—an influence contrary to the guidance of the Holy Spirit. As the mother of three children, she should feel her accountability to God to move discreetly in all respects, that she may hold her influence over her children, and not pursue any course that they and many others would regard as so questionable. She should realize that her duty to her God and to her children demands the most serious consideration. 20MR 59.2

My sister, the Lord is not in this matter. Such a marriage would bring strange results—results that would destroy the influence that a mother should earnestly seek to maintain over her own children. This influence I entreat of you to guard sacredly. God has solemnly charged you, as the mother of your children, to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. For you at this time to take a youth of twenty as your husband would be strangely inconsistent with your responsibilities as a mother of three sons now grown to manhood. 20MR 59.3

In the night season I was talking with you concerning these matters, and setting before you the inconsistency of the course under contemplation. I advise you to exercise your ingenuity of mind in an effort to help your children to understand the advantages of loving the Word of God. Show your children that you are cooperating with the Lord in an effort to save their souls. 20MR 59.4

In the night season it was presented before me that if you should take this strange step, the enemy of all righteousness would use this as a means of ruining the respect that your children would otherwise have for you, and would create in their hearts a feeling of contempt for you because of your lack of good judgment. Satan is seeking to destroy your influence in the home and in the church, and among unbelievers as well. 20MR 59.5

In past years we have had opportunity to observe several marriages of this sort, and the results have always been of a character to create great misery in the family life. 20MR 60.1

Now, my sister, I appeal to you to act like a woman of superior judgment. Do, I beseech of you, preserve every jot of your influence, in order that you may use it to the glory of God in giving wise counsel to your own children. You are held accountable before God for the good influence you may now have the power of exerting. For your own sake and for the sake of your children, cut this matter short. 20MR 60.2

In the night season I was saying, Give to your children as a true mother an example of living faith in God, and thus retain the respect and confidence that otherwise you might forever lose.—Letter 26, 1910. 20MR 60.3

Ellen G. White Estate

Washington, D. C.,

January 22, 1989.

Entire Letter.