Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #5 — Controlling Emotions

Picture: Counsel #5 — Controlling Emotions CR 100.1

Practice mindfulness, a technique used by some therapists to reduce stress and tension and increase compassion and empathy. For a Christian, mindfulness means learning to control negative emotions and rely on God’s Spirit for strength to engage with patience, care, and love. When you practice mindfulness, you won’t ambush your partner with past pain or regrets in the middle of a disagreement; you’ll learn to communicate in the present. CR 100.2

Mindfulness does not mean you must stifle your emotions or deny there are issues needing to be addressed. Rather, when you practice mindfulness, you’ll learn to soften your responses to build connection, intimacy, and trust.^[95]  CR 100.3

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1 NKJV CR 100.4

“Let not your married life be one of contention. If you do, you will both be unhappy. Be kind in speech and gentle in action, giving up your own wishes. Watch well your words, for they have a powerful influence for good or for ill. Allow no sharpness to come into your voices. Bring into your united life the fragrance of Christlikeness.” Ellen White in The Adventist Home, p. 107 CR 100.5

Reflect: How do you respond when you’re provoked?  CR 100.6