Counsels on Relationships

Counsel #5 — Assessing Your Relationship

Picture: Counsel #5 — Assessing Your Relationship CR 60.1

Here are some questions to help you assess whether your boyfriend or girlfriend is committed to the Lord and is growing in their faith.^[59] CR 60.2

• How do they treat their family and those that care for them?
• Are your individuality and autonomy preserved in the relationship or is your partner controlling and critical?
• Do you pray together, read the Bible together, attend church together?
• Does he or she pressure you to have sex before marriage?
• Does he or she help you grow in your own relationship with Jesus?
• Are all the fruits of the Spirit seen in his or her life?

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” Galatians 5:22, 23 NKJV CR 60.3

“The youth trust altogether too much to impulse. They should not give themselves away too easily, nor be captivated too readily by the winning exterior of the lover. Courtship, as carried on in this age, is a scheme of deception and hypocrisy, with which the enemy of souls has far more to do than the Lord.” Ellen White in Messages to Young People, p. 450 CR 60.4

Reflect: Does your relationship exhibit godly traits? Using the criteria above, what areas do you see needing improvement? CR 60.5