Letters and Manuscripts — Volume 4 (1883 - 1886)

Lt 81, 1886

Oyen, Brother

Copenhagen, Denmark

July 23, 1886

Previously unpublished.

Dear Brother Oyen:

I have felt much troubled in regard to the matter of Cecelia’s going to America with you and your wife. I know that your wife is much attached to Cecelia and that you think much of her, and I am troubled over this matter. I know that the appearance is not as it should be, your work brings you in close companionship, and there are dangers in this close relationship in your work that neither of you discern. The injunction of the Word of God is to abstain from the very appearance of evil. I am now writing to different individuals who have moved blindly until they are infatuated by the devil and so ensnared that it is most difficult to recover themselves from the snare of Satan. 4LtMs, Lt 81, 1886, par. 1

I consider Cecelia in great peril, and you are also in peril. You have been gaining an experience, and if you walk humbly with God, He will make you a man of usefulness, but your soul is in danger. I was shown years ago about the time of your marriage that you would fall into temptation and the grace of God alone could keep you from falling under its power, and it was through the affections and undue attachment for another Satan was making efforts to ruin you. But, my brother, you may come off conqueror. You may feel provoked with me for telling you. I shall urge Cecelia not to accompany you to America. You think too much of her, and she thinks too much of you. I am sure that it is altogether best for our brethren to find young men and educate them to labor as helpers with men. I have been shown that moral power is too feeble with many, that it is unsafe to connect men with women and girls with men, married or unmarried. If there is no evil work, there is the appearance of evil which you can and should avoid for Christ’s sake. 4LtMs, Lt 81, 1886, par. 2

Your wife does not seem to know or understand how to avoid temptation. She should not urge or encourage Cecelia to go with you to America. Things will transpire which will make her feel badly. Your connection in your work will arouse suspicion and excited talk. Should the mother of your wife see anything that looked as if you thought too much of Cecelia, she would make a troublesome time for you both. 4LtMs, Lt 81, 1886, par. 3

It is now that you want to show yourself a man. Your wife is a sufferer, and let nothing take place which will increase her sufferings. Treat her tenderly. She is your wife; her frequent sickness is a tax to your patience, and your home is not as it should be if she were well and cheerful; but then think, I know you do much of the time, how miserably oppressed her life is with disease, and with a feeble religious experience. She cannot exercise that faith, that trust in God, so that she can derive consolation from God. Her life has been almost devoid of faith. She has sown doubt and as the sure result will harvest that which she has sown. She loves you and has confidence in you. Do nothing that shall give her the least cause to think that you do not love her. But as you value your soul, keep yourself free from the charms of every girl or woman. Make your wife as happy as you possibly can, but let no hasty, sharp words escape your lips. Bear every trial with Christian patience, cling closely to the arm of Jesus. 4LtMs, Lt 81, 1886, par. 4

You will not be a free man, neither will Cecelia be a free woman, until this undue, ensnaring affection is broken entirely. It will prove a snare to you both which will, if allowed to go on, ruin you. You both have been unguarded and given occasion for remarks that your good should be evil spoken of. But for your soul’s sake and for Christ’s sake, do not have Cecelia go to America. I know how it would be if you would have her name ruined by being associated with you, then encourage her to go to Battle Creek. 4LtMs, Lt 81, 1886, par. 5