Letters and Manuscripts — Volume 1 (1844 - 1868)

Ms 13, 1868

Diary, February 1868

NP

February 1-29, 1868

Portions of this manuscript are published in 3MR 150-152; 10MR 29-30; 2Bio 228-229.

Sabbath, February 1, 1868

[Orleans, Mich.,]

Arose sad and dispirited. My courage is gone. My heart is weighed down with anguish. I can go no farther until I know for a surety the Lord will be my helper, my trust. I did not attend meeting, for I am sick, body and mind. Remained at Brother Olmstead’s through the day. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 1

I have had a special season of prayer. I have most earnestly committed my case to God, and feel a degree of relief. My spirit finds rest in Jesus. There is not one upon earth upon whom I can lean for encouragement or strength. No one, not even my husband, can have an understanding of my mind. He is a stranger to my trials, my temptations, my conflicts and buffetings. His own case occupies his mind, and I ought not to expect that appreciation of my peculiar position my spirit so earnestly craves. I long to lean upon someone, but God sees perhaps this is not best and breaks my hold from everyone, that I shall cling to Him alone. I cry unto God for wisdom, grace, and power to control my spirit at all times and offend not in word. My lips shall not sin. I will keep my mouth with a bridle. Wrote my mind to James. Confessed my wrong in speaking and acting sometimes. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 2

Sunday, February 2, 1868

[Orleans,]

Arose feeling somewhat relieved in my feelings. Attended meeting. Spoke to the people in the afternoon for about two hours with some earnestness. Took dinner at Brother William Wilson’s, then drove home. Had a cold ride. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 3

Monday, February 3, 1868

[Greenville,]

Feel some relieved in my feelings. Gave the letters I have written to James. He read them. He wrote to Battle Creek. I could not sanction it. He burned it. Wrote another, with which I concur heartily. Brother Thomas Wilson, his wife, and wife’s sister came for advice. We advised them the best we could. Brother and Sister Maynard visited us in the evening to ask in regard to what is best to take to Sister Savage. They seem willing to help. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 4

Tuesday, February 4, 1868

[Greenville,]

Was sick, unable to sit up. Took no food through the day. Sister Maynard came and gave me a bath. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 5

Wednesday, February 5, 1868

[Greenville,]

Sick. Ate nothing. Could not sit up. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 6

Thursday, February 6, 1868

[Greenville,]

Thursday awoke relieved in body and mind. Prepared to go to Alma. Feel too weak to do much of anything. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 7

Friday, February 7, 1868

[Alma, Mich.,]

We journeyed to Alma. It was a beautiful day—so much more pleasant than we thought it would be. At noon we stopped at Myrick’s to refresh our team and ourselves—to eat our dinner. Found they are from New England—Vermonters. It was a good place to stop. Did not get to our journey’s end until eight o’clock. We were so very weary. I was glad to lie down to rest, but I was so tired and nervous I could sleep but little. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 8

Sabbath, February 8, 1868

[Alma,]

Attended meeting in the forenoon. My husband spoke one hour. I followed; spoke a little over one hour. In the afternoon Brother [J. N.] Andrews spoke to the people. In the evening I spoke again one hour with freedom, upon the health question from 2 Peter, first chapter. In the forenoon I spoke from Mark: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart,” etc. [Chapter 12:30.] The congregation was large. About three hundred were present. They listened with eager interest. It was the largest gathering which they have had in this place. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 9

Sunday, February 9, 1868

[Alma,]

My husband spoke upon the law and the gospel. The children made so much noise my brain is tired. I remained at Brother Keephus’ [?] to rest, but it is only weariness. I spoke at one for nearly two hours upon temperance. Brother [J. N.] Andrews spoke in the evening. I occupied about fifteen minutes previous to Brother Andrews, speaking upon the necessity of sisters dressing neatly and orderly. If they put on the short dress they should have it after the pattern. Brother Andrews gave a most appropriate and solemn discourse. Appointed meetings to be held here in three weeks. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 10

Monday, February 10, 1868

Arose languid and depressed. My head aches nearly all the time. There was considerable confusion in getting ready to go to Ithaca. Called upon Sister Potters. She sent a dress to Sister Mead. It is a valuable dress, homemade, woolen. She is a poor widow in trouble, for those who have managed her farm have dealt dishonestly with her. She has appealed to the law. We found Sister Jeffrey sick, unable to help herself much. She liberally donated five dollars to me, five to Brother [J. N.] Andrews, ten to the tract fund, and five to Brother Fuller. I applied the five given me to Brother Fuller. Sister Jeffrey gave me a pair of stockings and a can of peaches. We had a season of prayer with Sister Jeffrey. We drove on to Greenbush. On the way met Davis, from Mill Grove, N.Y. Conversed with him a short time. Arrived at Brother Sevy’s about eight o’clock. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 11

Tuesday, February 11, 1868

[Greenbush, Mich.,]

Arose at about five and wrote several notes for David Waggoner to take back with him to Orange and Greenville. He goes for us to get our horse and leave Grey. Wrote ten pages to Brother and Sister Gargett. Brother Sevy has notified the people of the meeting tomorrow evening. Brother [J. N.] Andrews preaches in schoolhouse. We had a meeting of the brethren in this place. My husband made appropriate remarks, which I think will help the case of some. I talked to brethren and sisters and youth earnestly. I had a testimony for Brother [Harmon] Richmond. He deserves pity. He said all I said was just so—that he could not have told it as well. He seemed encouraged. All the brethren and nearly all the sisters spoke. It was a profitable meeting. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 12

Wednesday, February 12, 1868

Arose at half past five. Resolved to be more watchful, to speak carefully at all times to my husband. We engaged in prayer together. May the Lord help us to do right every time and disappoint the enemy. Wrote a couple of testimonies, and sent them to the ones for whom they are written. Sent twelve pages to the Brothers Green. Leave four pages in this place for Brother Sevy’s family. I went to Brother Harmon Richmond’s. They are not free. They do not bear with each other. The spirit of fault finding, of blaming each other, poisons their happiness and makes them miserable. I felt greatly depressed and burdened as I left the house. We returned to Brother Sevy’s. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 13

I felt unable to attend meeting, but did so in answer to the earnest solicitations of Brother Sevy’s family. Brother [J. N.] Andrews preached upon the signs of the times. I followed; spoke about fifteen minutes. A goodly number were out, but it is a very hard place to work. Nearly all are spiritualists. David Waggoner came into the meeting to see if any one was at home. His journey was successful. Jim is now ready to journey with Jack. Found many letters waiting my perusal, some of deep interest. Brother Ball writes that the Brothers Green are serving God. Retired at half past ten o’clock. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 14

Thursday, February 13, 1868

Rested well through the night. James and self united in prayer together that God would strengthen us to serve Him acceptably. Prepared to leave that place and went on our way to St. Charles. The weather is mild. It was a beautiful day to journey. We went to Chesaning. Took dinner at Brother Milks’. Sister Milks is lame. She has been an invalid for two years. She spent six weeks at the Health Institute, which was a great benefit to her. We were very faint and hungry. Our dinner was ready at three o’clock. It was an excellent, hygienic dinner. We enjoyed it much. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 15

Left Brother Milks’ at about four. Rode nine miles to St. Charles. It was very cold. We got down in the bottom of the sleigh to keep from the keen breeze, which was directly in our faces. We drove up to Brother Griggs’ about dark. Found his wife and daughter sick with severe colds, threatened with inflammation of the lungs. She coughs much. Met with Sister Wilkinson. She is a good, nice Christian woman. Met with a girl by the name of Schaupp, German recently from Germany. She came with her brother. They were sent for by a brother who had embraced the truth here in our country. She is a Christian, keeping the truth as well as she can understand it. They were formerly Catholics. They are smart, intelligent people, good-hearted, and beloved by those who know them. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 16

Friday, February 14, 1868

Arose between four and five. Rested well during the night. Awoke at three. Sister Griggs is coughing badly. By request of Sister Griggs I engaged in prayer at the family altar. Had freedom in supplicating the blessing of the Lord upon Sister Griggs in her affliction. The Spirit of the Lord seemed to soften hearts. We sang “Calvary,” and then took our places around the table. Enjoyed the hygienic breakfast. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 17

Before eating, I wrote a few lines to Anne Foster, who is in trouble and remorse because of her wrong course in her family. She has been indiscreet—she says, “possessed by the devil.” She has driven a good, conscientious husband from her by her wicked course. He became so discouraged he gave up praying and went to parties, dances, etc. I gave her the advice I thought she most needed—to find her husband, confess to him in humbleness that she sees her wrong, and then be converted and reform. May God bless this letter to her salvation, is my prayer. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 18

We now go to Tittabawassee. Arrived at Brother Truesdale’s about one o’clock. This is a good family, wholly in the truth. We took our dinner. Eight more came in a sleigh from St. Charles. Brother Hawley came in. We drove out with him one mile to the meetinghouse. Found a small house, but warm reception. Feel at home here. Didn’t attend meeting in the evening. Brother Andrews went. We sat up conversing until nearly nine o’clock. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 19

Sabbath, February 15, 1868

[Tittabawassee, Mich.,]

My head troubles me some this morning. I shall attend meeting, trusting in God to give us strength. My husband spoke in forenoon upon conversion and baptism. I spoke in afternoon upon health reform. The house was well filled with attentive listeners. Brother [J. N.] Andrews spoke in the evening with freedom. Brethren from St. Charles, about twelve in number, came to the meeting. Brother Walton and his [family] came to the meeting. They were surprised and happily disappointed to find us all here and to have the privilege of hearing us. I am feeling much exhausted through constant labor. My prayer is for strength for the work. Sisters from Midland were at the meeting, and Brother and Sister Marsh from ______. Sixteen were present. All appreciated the labors in this place. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 20

Sunday, February 16, 1868

[Tittabawassee,]

Arose in Tittabawassee in the morning with headache and great exhaustion. My husband preached in the morning, showing the relation the law and gospel sustain to each other and to conversion. The message was clear and a deep interest was manifested in the subject. Brother Stoddard, who once had been a minister, said he never listened to such a discourse. Said he would give $10.00 to have it in print, for he could meet any one with it who wished to oppose. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 21

I spoke in the afternoon to a full house upon these words: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart,” etc. [Matthew 22:37.] I had freedom in speaking. I never saw more respectful attention. All seemed to listen as for their lives. My husband spoke a short time. I again spoke and we both entreated souls who were in an unsaved state to turn to the Lord, then to give themselves to God and lay the wealth of their affections, their talents, and all they possessed at the feet of Jesus. We invited those who wished to commence from that day to serve God, to come forward. Youth and children came forward, numbering twenty-one. We then prayed earnestly for them and closed the meeting. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 22

Monday, February 17, 1868

Rode to Brother Truesdale’s. Spent the day. Was so thoroughly exhausted, I rested through the day. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 23

Through the day they told me it was expected that I should address the people in the evening. I felt almost prostrated, yet thought I would try. I had told Brother [J. N.] Andrews that he would have to speak, but he was afraid the people would be disappointed. I arose in great weakness, spoke from these words, “What shall it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” Mark 8:36, 37. I made an earnest, solemn appeal to the hearers. All listened and many seemed convicted. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 24

I felt most deeply the subject and the people seemed to receive the word. A most solemn impression appeared to be made upon the people. God grant it may be a savor of life. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 25

Afterwards I learned that Brother [J. N.] Andrews had selected this text to speak from if he addressed the people. We said not a word to one another, yet our minds were led in the same direction. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 26

Tuesday, February 18, 1868

Meetings were held in the evening. I spoke to the people for about two hours upon health reform. Through the day visited Brother Whitman’s in company with Brother [J. N.] Andrews and Sister Truesdale. They were glad to see us. We did not meet Brother Whitman and his sons until the dinner hour. After dinner we engaged in conversation with him. We tried to encourage him to come out fully on the Lord’s side, to be baptized and erect the family alter. He had many excuses. He was not fit. Thought he ought to be dead before he was buried. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 27

Wednesday, February 19, 1868

Rode to Brother Truesdale’s and then to meeting. Meetings were held all through the day. My husband spoke in forenoon; Brother [J. N.] Andrews in the afternoon. I followed with remarks quite at length, entreating those who had been interested through the meetings to commence from that day to serve God. We called forward those who wished to start in the service of the Lord. Quite a number came forward. I spoke several times, beseeching souls to break the bands of Satan and start then. One mother went to her son and wept and entreated him. He seemed hard, stubborn, and unyielding. I then arose and addressed Brother Whitman, begged him to not stand in the way of his children. He started, then arose, spoke, said he would commence from that day. This was heard with glad hearts by all. Brother Whitman is a precious man. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 28

Sister Bailey’s husband then arose, testified that he would be a Christian. He is an influential man—a lawyer. His daughter was upon the anxious seat. Brother Whitman then added his entreaties to ours. Sister Whitman’s also to their children. We entreated and at last prevailed. All came forward. The fathers and all the sons and other fathers followed their example. It was a day of gladness. Sister Bailey said it was the happiest day of her life. Meeting in evening. Brother [J. N.] Andrews spoke. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 29

Thursday, February 20, 1868

We rode down to Brother Truesdale’s. Packed our things to start on our journey to Vassar. Had a meeting in the morning. I spoke to the people upon the necessity of people with different organizations coming into the truth. They should not, each with their peculiar temperaments, expect to have everyone think and act like themselves. Some have been educated to be coarse and rough, others have a refined taste and cultivated manners. All these different tastes are brought right through the reception of truth. The uneducated, slack, and untidy cry, “We must all come down upon a level.” We showed them that there was no such thing as a low level. It is, All must come up on a level, be purified, exalted, refined, and elevated by the truth and come up upon a level. We spoke plainly to the slack and untidy. God help the church which is inexperienced amid the perverseness of these last days! 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 30

We repaired to the water and fifteen were buried with Christ in baptism. We rejoiced at the sight. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 31

We then took dinner with Brother Truesdale’s family and started on our journey. I was very, very weary, and somewhat depressed in spirits. We passed through Saginaw City. It is a large place and building up all the time. Arrived at Brother Degones’ [?] after dark and were gladly received by them. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 32

Friday, February 21, 1868

Arose sick in body and depressed in mind. My husband and myself took a bath, which relieved the feverish state of the system somewhat. Brother [J. N.] Andrews and my husband attended meeting in the evening. I retired to bed. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 33

Sabbath, February 22, 1868

[Vassar, Mich.,]

Arose feeling some better in body and relieved in mind. Did not attend meeting in forenoon. Wrote several pages to Brother Ball. My husband spoke in forenoon. I attended meeting and spoke in afternoon. Brother [J. N.] Andrews spoke in evening. The house was well filled and there was excellent attention. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 34

Sunday, February 23, 1868

My husband spoke in the morning upon law and gospel. I did not attend meeting. Wrote a part of the time and cooked gems and pudding for dinner. When the people returned they were overjoyed to hear the subject on Sabbath made so plain. They all said they never heard the like before. The subject was treated in a wonderful manner. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 35

I spoke in afternoon from the words: “Whosoever will come after Me, let him take up his cross, and follow Me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it,” etc. [Mark 8:34, 35.] I had great freedom. There was a crowded house. After I ceased speaking we invited those who wished [The entry for this day is not complete.] 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 36

Monday, February 24, 1868

Had a meeting through the day. Brother Andrews went ten miles to Watrousville to attend a funeral. My husband and myself attended morning meeting. We labored earnestly for the people and gave important instruction such as the people needed. This was the most profitable meeting we had. Attended baptism administered by J. N. Andrews. Nearly all the brethren and sisters from Watrousville assembled. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 37

One poor woman came purposely to hear me speak, but was too late. Had been out of health and dared not venture out in the cold. I tried to comfort her the best I could. Several wanted me to encourage them; told me their troubles. I was so confused I did not know what to do. Oh, how glad I was to get a little rest and peace! It is so difficult to remain calm with everything going on—some talking all at one time. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 38

Tuesday, February 25, 1868

Arose at five o’clock. Prepared to leave Brother Dond’s for St. Charles. Got started on our way about seven o’clock. It was a very pleasant day for traveling. Stopped at Saginaw; purchased pair of slips for Willie. James bought a pair for himself. Arrived at Brother Griggs’ about two o’clock. Took dinner between two and three. Was hungry; enjoyed the food. Wrote fifteen pages of testimony for church at Washington, N. H. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 39

There was a meeting that evening. My husband spoke a short time. After Brother [J. N.] Andrews had lead in saying many very important, instructive things, I spoke about fifteen minutes. Appointed meeting for next day. I did not feel clear in regard to my duty in going to Alma. I felt that my work was not done at Tuscola and Watrousville. Had very striking dreams during the night. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 40

Wednesday, February 26, 1868

[Tuscola, Mich.,]

Arose early. Talked with my husband in regard to duty. I felt that it would be well to return to Tuscola and finish the work there; Brother [J. N.] Andrews to go to Alma and fill appointment there. Wrote fifteen pages, enclosed in an envelope and sent to the office; for Washington, forty-four pages. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 41

Put on my cloak and hat and walked a short distance to Brother Guilford’s. Found people gathered together in two rooms. I spoke to them about one hour from these words, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” etc. [Matthew 25:23.] All seemed interested. As soon as I ceased speaking I left the meeting and hurried to Brother Griggs’. Took dinner, and about two we stepped into the sleigh and were on our way back to Tuscola. When we were within a few miles of our stopping place, Brother Miller hailed us and urged us to go to his home, but we were very cold and he lived two miles farther than Brother Spooners. We stopped at the first place, which was brother Spooners’. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 42

Thursday, February 27, 1868

[Watrousville, Mich.,]

Arose early and prepared to go to Watrousville. At Vassar found letters from Battle Creek. Rode sixteen miles. Stopped at Brother Walton’s. Was disappointed in finding Sister Walton gone. Her mother and a neighbor who started to serve God in the meeting at Vassar prepared our dinner, which we did not get till late. After three o’clock wrote sixteen pages, eight to Edson and eight to Brother and Sister Amadon. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 43

Had a meeting in the evening for the church. I bore a straight message to Dr. Dennis. He squirmed some, but we pressed the matter still closer until he was quieted. We fear that the man does not see the sinfulness of sin, and feel his need of a Saviour, as a lost sinner without pardon for all his sins. Our meetings closed and I was so weary I retired about ten o’clock, but had not fallen asleep when I heard someone come, and was pleased to find Sister Walton had returned. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 44

Friday, February 28, 1868

[Tuscola,]

We rose early and I wrote ten pages of testimony for Dr. Dennis, and then prepared to get in the sleigh and go to Tuscola. We arrived at Brother Spooners’ about eleven o’clock. Found the Review at Brother Walton’s and read much of it while riding to Vassar. After dinner wrote eight pages of testimony to Sister Doud. Was glad to retire to rest, for I was very weary. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 45

Sabbath, February 29, 1868

[Tuscola,]

Attended meeting at Tuscola. My husband spoke in the morning. Only in the Lord should believers marry. In the afternoon I spoke upon the tongue being an unruly member. I spoke two hours then stepped into Brother Palmer’s. Ate a graham biscuit and a couple of apples and hastened back to the meeting. A conference meeting was in session. I arose and spoke one hour to individuals. I had testimony for reproving individual wrongs. We had an interesting, exciting time. Brother Fisher was encouraged and comforted. He had been passing through a terrible struggle, giving up tobacco, intoxicating drinks, and hurtful indulgences. He was very poor and high, proud-spirited. He had made a great effort to overcome. May God assist him in his efforts. Some felt exceedingly bad because I brought out these cases before others. I was sorry to see this spirit. Sister Doud was terribly stirred. She talked and cried and found fault. We did not lighten the burden, for all this development only showed how much she needed the reproof. 1LtMs, Ms 13, 1868, par. 46