Letters and Manuscripts — Volume 15 (1900)

Lt 205, 1900

White, W. C.; White, May

San Francisco, California

December 21, 1900

Previously unpublished.

My Dear Children Willie and May White:

I arise this morning at two o’clock. I cannot sleep longer. My heart is troubling me considerably. I went to church and there were two stoves in the two aisles, with long pipes reaching halfway up to the ceiling. A large crowd was in the church. I had been there about fifteen minutes when I became almost breathless. I then told Elder Corliss I could not speak. There was so little vitality in the air. Not a window was opened. I told him I would make an effort in the afternoon, if I became stronger. I would sit and listen to him. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 1

I sat near where he was standing. I then felt a dizziness and thought I would soon become unconscious. Just then Sara touched me. I knew I was not safe to start up and move, for I might create a sensation by falling headlong. I had got behind the organ on the platform, determined not to move, hoping the infirmity might pass away. But never was I more glad to have Sara touch me, which had an influence to arouse me. I said to her, Take me right out of here. She helped me to get into the anteroom and then in the cars. We went to my room. The bed was my resort until time for meeting in the afternoon. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 2

The ventilation is poor but special efforts were made to get in clean air as much as possible. I had my dinner on a tray, then attended the meeting and spoke. I had to hold on to the stand the whole time, but I spoke. I should say no meeting was appointed in afternoon, but when Elder Corliss found I could not speak he asked would I speak in the afternoon. I told him I would try. He asked the congregation, if Sister White would venture to speak in the afternoon, would they come out. A ready assent was given and the congregation in the afternoon was large; not as large as in the forenoon because many of the Sabbath school children were not present. There was a large company of intelligent-looking people present. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 3

After I had ceased speaking, Elder Corliss made some remarks and called them forward. There was a decided movement and many responded. I made some remarks too, in reference to this phase of the meeting, then left. I think it may be in the providence of God, for in the afternoon there were several members present that were not there in [the] forenoon. I did not regain my vitality. I am depressed; have heart difficulty. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 4

Now as this is an important meeting and I cannot do one-half I would be glad to do, I think you had better come, and if you cannot be spared to come at once, come as soon as you can. I dare not take on anything extra, for I am greatly let down. The meetings you suggested to me, morning meetings, must be carried on. Elder Corliss would be glad to have worked, but he says you are the one that understands all about these special meetings. “He is,” he said, “a capital worker in lines where I have no experience, and now we need him here now.” I lay the matter before you and there leave it. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 5

I may, if I do not increase in vitality, come home the first of the week. Home is the best place for me. There was, the past night, the clattering of carriages and trams until after midnight. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 6

If you come and take hold in morning meetings, I think you could do a most important work that Elder Corliss cannot do, lacking the experience. I think you had better come and make this meeting all it is possible. I shall speak Sunday. Follow your own convictions, but they need help. 15LtMs, Lt 205, 1900, par. 7

Mother.